May the long time sun shine upon you, all love surround you and the pure light within you, guide your way on "~Incredible String Band

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Two Roads Diverged........

In early March we said goodbye to our friends in Santa Barbaara, (with the exception of Sunshine and Dylan who split town in true gypsy fashion. I understand guys, when it's time to go it's times to go ! No worries !)and drove south for Moss's court date.


I am happy to report everything went well. At the last minute the DA suddenly wanted to make a deal. She offered to delay for six months then drop the charges. However, Moss would have to agree to some community service work. Our lawyer advised us to take the deal because it would not hurt our civil case at all and it would save us money in the long run with not having to go to trial. Now we can proceed with the civil trial, but not before a much needed six month break from legal hassles.


In mid April Moss, Sage and I flew to Florida to see my mom and dad, who had yet to meet Sage. We stayed for 12 days and had a wonderful time swimming in the gulf and visiting. My dad and step mom live in Sarasota and my mom and step dad live in Vero Beach.


We are now back in California and contemplating our next move. As always, we have many options. We will be vending at the Faerie Worlds Festival again this year and need to find a nice woodsy place where we can settle in for a time to make boots, dolls, puppets and dye 30 lbs of wool. The question is, where would be the best place to do that. It needs to be someplace easy to get to, but at the same time remote, wild and inexpensive. There are some beautiful and very remote campgrounds in the mountains north of Santa Barbara, but the tiny mountain roads that lead to them are winding, narrow and prone to rock slides. If we can make it down those roads, it would be a lovely place to nest for a time. We may also head north ( which we need to do anyway this summer for the FW festival), and stay near Cougar Hot Springs in oregon. Then again, Northern California has some very beautiful and inexpensive campgrounds as well.


The truth is, with our veggie system down, we now have to pay for fuel and diesel is up near 5.00 a gallon. Increasingly we find ourselves parked for days at a time in one spot as we save money just so we can drive to another spot. To make matters worse we have recently purchased another vehicle, a 1983 Mercedes 190 D. It's a great little car that gets about 40 miles to the gallon. We bought this car a month ago for only 3000 dollars. We bought it because we thought we would be staying on some friends land up north for an extended period of time and needed a way to get in and out of town easily. Now however, due to to some serious family/domestic problems on his part,it seems we might not be able to stay there after all. That is really to bad as it is such a beautiful cabin, hand built in the 1850's right on the Rouge river.It has the most beautiful balcony and porch, as well as a bathroom with a jacuzzi tub. Gorgeous. We were going to stay there in exchange for work on his organic farm. There still is some hope that we can stay there, but it is slim, so we are making other plans.


As much as I love bus and nomadic living, I have been a bit conflicted about it of late, and am starting to wonder if full time travel is the best thing for Sage.


There is something to be said for staying in one place year after year, watching the seasons change and the trees grow. There is a feeling one gets from knowing a piece of land, it's secret trails and wildlife, as intimately as the lines on a lovers face. To know, through careful observation and long quiet walks in the woods all the magic and revelation the forest holds. To know the deer and vole trails, the best watering and swimming holes, where the various plants grow from year to year in all there many cycles. To see yourself and life cycle reflected in the seasons. To know the joy of planting a garden with your own hands, helping to care for it and then eating the food you helped grow. When living this simply and close to the earth in a day to day sort of way, there is a true magic and peaceful rhythm one experiences that cannot be substituted or experienced in any way other way. I deeply miss this connection to place, to land.


Having experienced these things myself ( Moss and I lived in a tipi for years at one point )it is my hope that Sage will have the opportunity to as well. This is difficult on the road. Yes, we can walk in the woods from place to place and explore many and diverse habitats as we travel, but it is not quite the same.


I guess what I am saying is, I am feeling a bit like it may be time to try to lay some roots. In my ideal world we would have a home base, somewhere wild and remote, preferably in a community but not necessarily, where we could grow a garden and build a cobb house. A place with lots of trees, a pond or stream and a nice sunny, south facing meadow. From there we could travel part of the year in the bus, maybe even leave the bus at times and travel internationally by foot, wagon or boat.


So, we are putting that out there in the universe as our prayer, that we find a piece of land someplace wild and full of magic. A place where we can lay some roots and grow a garden, at least for part of the year anyway.


One thing is for certain though, neither Moss nor I could ever settle down permanently. We both have the heart and spirit of a gypsy nomad. I have known since early childhood that I was destined, for better or for worse to spend a good deal of my life wandering, seeking out the dsuty, remote and wind swept corners of the earth.


Gypsy, rolling stone, nomad, wanderer, tinker, hobo..call us what you will,we have been called by many names, but one thing is true, most people who wander relentlessly do tend to feel this call from a young age. You know who you are. Keep in mind, this nomad that I write of is quite a different animal than the one who enjoys frequent trips, usually pre aranged via travel agents, to resorts all over the world. For the true nomad it is more about a way of life. There is also a kind of frantic yet aimless quality to the travel. It is rather like you are racing to experience as much as life has to offer in the short amount of time given


When ignored this calling for the road only gets louder and louder until you find your thoughts increasingly filled with images of travel in all forms, train hopping, bus conversions, gypsy wagons, RVs, hitchhiking, sailing. Before you know it your drifting off at work or school, unable to concentrate as you continuously design and redesign the perfect bus conversion or gypsy wagon in your head.


As much as I love this wandering life, at the the same time I have always been a homebody, believe it or not. In fact I am probably the biggest homebody I have ever known. I would much rather sit in the bus and read, work on felting, watch the fire or clean than go out to a movie or friends party.


It's true, I am a basket of contradictions and somehow I must find a way to marry these two sides of myself, the side that wants, no, NEEDS to keep moving and traveling, with the side that wants to be grounded and have a home base.



I believe I have found the answer and now we just need to manifest it in the form of a piece of land or community....






Every Sunday this group of Veterans gather on the beach in Santa barabara and put up this memorial to the fallen soliders of the Iraqi war. One cross for each person. It is heartwrenching..

Sage enjoying the beach in FL, who by the way, is now walking fully at ten months ! In fact, she is running !

Camping on the beach , we have a nice view....


Our friend Sunshine drew this picture for sweet pigeon Palomino, no longer with us..

Sage peers from the bus window....

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad things have turned out well for Moss. I can't help but see the humour in myself anxiously waiting (in Australia!) for your next post to let us know how the court case went. I can relax now. Life is a real journey isn't it. It's one of the things that makes it exciting, challenging and wonderful. Just when we think we have it sorted, we realise it isn't necessarily. I wish you you all the best.

Kia Kaha

Amy E said...

Sage is such a cutie! I love that green swimsuit. My mom and stepdad live near Tampa, and the beaches are so beautiful compared to the ones here in TEXAS.

I'll be praying for your perfect spot to land and roost.

Anonymous said...

I knew things would turn out well for Moss! Never doubted it. I know the struggle you face. I traveled all through my teens and early 20's finally, when I became pregnant felt the need to put down roots. It was a difficult transition. I do believe there are many ways to bring rhythm to a child's life, on the road or otherwise. I just couldn't figure out how to maintain that rhythm and security for myself while traveling. Sage seems to be flourishing. She just glows! With all that sunshine, there will be roots...

Lizz said...

Being still someplace for some length of time is balancing travel and movement. Perfect really.

Blessings and happy manefesting. Like conception, it's very fun!

Nina said...

glad the legal troubles are no longer legal troubles ;-)

I understand the conflict between having a home base vs nomadic living. We want to do a bus conversion- it just nags at my soul to do this- but I feel a strong pull to live in the country, have a huge sustainable organic garden and possibly a cob house or a yurt. It's so confusing! The need to travel, to roam, is SO strong, really a urgency....but so is having a home base and community with other like-minded folk. So, for now, we decided to buy a cheap 1976 RV and take off for four months this summer- just meditate over the whole thing. I think the answer will have to be a mix of both travel and stationary living. If I were to choose one or the other, I would likely get antsy and change my mind. Always on the go.......

glad to hear all is well. Happy felting!

Unknown said...

Thanks everyone for the comments and kind words !

Kia ~ YES, life is such a journey ! So exciting though, never knowing what is around the bend. A big part of me thrives on the unpredictability of it all...


Amy ~ Yeah the beachs on the west coast are not the greates either. Pretty to look at, but forget about swimming, unless of course you have awet suit. The gulf coast of Texas has some nice beaches though, doesnt it ?


April ~ That is just it, rhythm, and how to maintain it for sage on the road. I really feel it is important. I mean, we have a rhythm in the bus that we try to adhere to, but again, it is just not the same as flowing with the natural rhythm in nature.She seems to be doing well despite. I have been reading all these books on child development and how early experiences shape who we are and getting a bit bummend. I SO wanted her early experiences to be predominantly of the natural world, but it has not worked that way as much as I would have liked...


Lizz ~ Yup, it's all about finding the balance.....


Nina ~ Yes, yes, yes ! Everything you said ! I feel these things as well. How to have community, stability, grounding and at the same time fulfill your wanderlust...

Enjoy your travels and would love to cross paths some time !

Love and Light to All ~ Pixie

Anonymous said...

not sure what it is, but of all the blogs out there...yours resonates closely with me....isn't Cougar great....as always mi casa es su casa in NW PA....i feel i could learn alot from you. i think it's the wanderlust. i own a home in the woods-stream and all....but out there calls loudly! Subversive Mommie. p.s. i enquired about the salvia and pregnancy ages ago...still sitting on my salvia...it's too much!!!

Anonymous said...

Glad things have worked out well concerning the trial. It's good to get a post from you, I've been checking almost daily. Sage is getting big! My kids always start walking around 8-9 months, it's funny to see someone so small walking and running! :0)

Hoping you find peace, no matter the decision. It will all work out as it is meant to...
Blessings~

Unknown said...

Subversive Mommie !
Of course I remember you ! Thank you for the kind words about our blog and yes cougar is one of THE best hot springs around, indeed. I grew up in P.A and will certainly take you up on your offer when we come that way again. Thank you.

Salvia Divinorum..I love this herb but have not partaken of it since before I was pregnant. Now, I am afraid it will go through the breast milk.

It's a powerful, sacred plant for sure......

Unknown said...

Jenn ~ Yeah, I know... I have been lame in posting. I just cant bring myself to post unless I have somthing intresting to say or some kind or story to tell. I appreciate everyone who still reads and comments.

Also, I noticed for some reason I missed youon my link section, sorry for that. I put up a link for you.

Yes, it is hysterical to see such a tiny person walking and running around !

Much Love ~ Pixie

Gypsy said...

Just wanted to say how much I love your posts. Although we have great plans of spending a year or so travelling around with our Munchkin, our lives at the moment are very suburban... we have chosen a different path for the time being. So it is wonderful to experience your path in this way, and to see your beautiful pictures. Good luck with the next adventure.

Mindy said...

I'm so relieved that the legal troubles have worked themselves out! I think of you guys all the time and in some ways feel you are distant relatives.

Pixie, I can totally understand the conflict you feel. I dance with the same conflict and have all my life, since I was a young, young child.

At times I feel all I want is to live in one place forever and have close firends and roots and be a part of a place. Other times I feel as though if I can't get away I may just die.

It's hard to balance these two conflicting natures, but it's possible. If anyone can do it I know you and Moss can. Just go with the calling of your heart, and it will lead you to the place and space that is for you.

Mindy said...

I'm so relieved that the legal troubles have worked themselves out! I think of you guys all the time and in some ways feel you are distant relatives.

Pixie, I can totally understand the conflict you feel. I dance with the same conflict and have all my life, since I was a young, young child.

At times I feel all I want is to live in one place forever and have close firends and roots and be a part of a place. Other times I feel as though if I can't get away I may just die.

It's hard to balance these two conflicting natures, but it's possible. If anyone can do it I know you and Moss can. Just go with the calling of your heart, and it will lead you to the place and space that is for you.

Unknown said...

Earthmommy !
Hey sisiter ! It is so nice to know that you, and so many others understand this conflict.

When I first wrote this post I was a little concerned and had to ask Moss if it was too confusing and sounded like I was insane...lol.

He assured me it did not.

Maybe it does, but oh well, I am what I am, and I make no claims to being 100& sane ( that would be too boring.).


Anyway earthmommy, thanks for the vote of confidence !

((Hugs)) ~ Pixie

Cupcake Mama said...

I wonder how we can have both as well~ to be free, playing in waves on both coasts~ as well as *some* routine and a place to plant seeds and watch them grow~

Time will tell I suppose....

Tiffany said...

I know, somewhere, someplace... there is a perfect piece of land... designed specifically for you all. It'll all come together. You've been good to the earth... and the earth will be good to you.

Fantastic news about Moss!!!

And Sage... her name speaks volumes. You can see such an old soul in those beautiful little eyes. :)

Vinara said...

I love the picture your friend drew for you of your sweet pigeon, it's so pretty :D. I'm glad things turned out well for you at the court and I hope they continue to do so in the future. I hope you find your perfect place to lay down some roots soon :-)

Bright blessings!

Lucy

That Raw Vegan Girl said...

I am glad to hear all is well with mosses court date. Looks like you have a lot to decide. We are finally putting down roots ourselves. Although I think traveling a few weeks out of the year is important. Many many blessings to your family!

Amy E said...

Pixie - I just wanted to tell you Happy Mother's Day!

Amy

Anonymous said...

Well, I don't think I can relate exactly - well, maybe? I want to put down roots, but just move every few years, which we have been doing! I always thought it was some kind of flaw on my part, you know, the grass is always greener type of thing, but I really like to move on, meet new people, find new things to get excited about, and probably, yes, escape the things I don't like and can't change. Anyway, I thought your post was beautiful. And, as always, if you're ever up in our neck of the woods, we would love to meet up with you guys! Our bus still sits, most of the seats out, with DH trying to decide if we can ever afford to drive the thing with the price of diesel! Sigh.

Carol in WA

Unknown said...

These days I only ever have a few minutes to myself and I wanted to stop over here for a breath of inspiration and wisdom...
I'm so glad to hear that you will be getting a break from the legal garbage for the time being.
As always, Sage is amazing and I just love your work and how you share your lives with us!
Thank you!

I do hope that our paths will cross this summer at the Gathering and perhaps again...

Anonymous said...

Sweet deal re: legal troubles, Pixie. Glad you, Moss and Sage are doin well even if gas prices are crazy crazy. Its only been 6 months since I sold the big green and already the pull to start again is growing. My boyfriend also has some legal issues goingon but its dodgy whether they'll stick. Seeing you both in your rolling home makes me long so hard for open road travel even if its only on weekends. Getting harder to ignore that call to roll any place for no reason. Selling my horse will net some $$ so maybe I'll be looking for a short bus shell sooner than I think. Be well, my friends. May you find that special private spot to raise Sage with the Mother! Blessed Be.